let’s talk about me 
i was a retain student in sec sch. My life was sux that time have no much friends. My sec school was ruined partly by my mother’s strictness. Had depression during my retained days… Shall not talk about it. It totally sux…
Ever since i came into poly, i get to know many friends. My classmates OGLMates… I started to socialized with more people. Get the courage to make more friends…
1st year of poly was very nice… i got to know my classmates, which i really found friends who are not as hypocrites as who i met in sec school. I really treasure my poly classmate alot. Sometime they might say some joking stuff, but they are still very nice ppl.
Ever since i joined the SIT Club being an OGL, i learnt alot of stuff. I have learnt leadership skills and many other stuff. The most of all, the bonding between people.
Also, during that process, i have get to pick up my encourage to get to know more people, boys and girls…
I was maybe timid and shy in the past during sec sch. Thats why my sec sch life sux. Not alot people understand me during that time.
I get emotional easily… Sometimes i do not know who to talk to about my personal stuff. I am not very close with my family members and seldom share my feeling with them. For my friends, i do not wanna trouble them as they have their own problem…
I might laugh with you, joke with you and play with you. Looking cheerful… Trying to act strong in front of people around me… But whats deep inside me, was opposite from what you think i am…
Till now, i still do not know. Whether am i living for others or living for myself. Occasionally, i felt that living for myself was selfish. But Living for others sometimes, when i see them happy i would feel glad. But theres still the feeling deep inside me…
Sometimee, u might see me with a group of guys together, talk abt craps, sometimes maybe even sound like a pervert.
Sometimes, u might see me with a group of girls. Like i am flirting… I’ve 1 group of girls in our class who called me “da jie” aka big sister and also janice who called me her “dad” aka father…
Sometimes when i get to know people who are down, or emo like me, i would try to comfort them. Make them feel at least abit better.
But what about myself… I still can’t escape my own emotion…
I sometimes really wish to cry on someone’s shoulder and tell him/her my own personal stuff…
There’s no one i can talk to sometime….. I dun think my mother or any other relatives/sibling knows me well…. Sometimes when i’m down alone at home, when my mother dunno wat exactly is going on with me. ASK me do stuff that i do not wanna do, i will argue back. Sometime i felt guilty but sometime when people are down they really need to be alone to calm down. and i’m those type of person who wont tell my mother regarding my personal stuff… if i tell my mother abt my stuff she sure will nag… so…. i dunno how…
Hard not to argue with my mom, but hard not to make her not to nag at me………………………………
I might look like i need symphaty… but…. for those who really knows me well…. you should know…..
Quek Jin Yuen… Who you really are…. How Do You Really Feel… You really wish to get out of your own emotional character… Can you do it??? On verge of breaking down? Trying to climb up… Be strong like how you endure your retained years in sec sch life… Can you do it???
am i living for others or myself…
I have no idea…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
queky
LOST & TIRED
